On July 14, HyperOne told the world who its new CEO was…

Boris Johnson? Oh for fucks sake, Before I say anything else, I want to say that I don’t know if these actors are actually part of HyperOne or not. This is because stock photos were used. Now that’s out of the way, “Boris Johnson” is Jared Polivka, an actor, writer, and producer:

A week after HyperOne’s CEO made the announcement, “Operation Head of Asia Pacific” Shavez Anwar and COO Eva Martin did the same.

I didn’t bother to look up Shavez Anwar or “Florine” (it’s not clear what her role as an executive is), but “Eva Martin” is Chrissy Bonilla, an actor from Los Angeles:

It looks like Bonilla is in charge of a “coming soon” corporate Zoom call for HyperOne. Also “coming soon” is an address from Sam Lee, who hasn’t been seen since last year, when HyperFund failed.

Lee is thought to be hiding out in Dubai from the police. In other news, HyperOne’s official Twitter account was recently shut down for “breaking Twitter’s rules”:
Actor executives, Sam Lee photos that were improperly cropped, and social media accounts that were deactivated… I think it’s time to stop joking around, guys.